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jokes of the day:
Growing Wild:
In sunny Califorina there was a man who was very proud of
his tan. He had taned every part of his body except his
penis. So wanting an all over tan, he decided to bury
himself in the sand and leave only his dick out to get the
all over tan that he craved. Now there happened to be an old
lady (around 80) hobbling down that same beach. When she
looked down and saw this penis laying on the sand. Taking
her cane she touched it and it got hard. She said " 40 years
ago I would have given anything for one of thoughs and here
that are growing wild.
A Deathbed Confession:
Becky was on her deathbed with her husband, John, maintaining a steady vigil by her side. As he held her fragile hand, his warm tears ran silently down his face, splashed onto her face, and roused her from her slumber.
She looked up and her pale lips began to move slightly. "My darling John," she whispered.
"Hush, my love," he said. "Go back to sleep. Shhh. Don't talk."
But she was insistent. "John," she said in her tired voice. "I have to talk. I have something I must confess to you."
"There's nothing to confess" replied the weeping John. "It's all right. everything's all right, go to sleep now."
"No, no. I must die in peace, John. I slept with your brother, your best friend and your father."
John mustered a pained smile and stroked her hand. "Hush now Becky, don't torment yourself. I know all about it." he said, "Why do you think I poisoned you?"
How Does a Man Keep His Youth?:
Q: How does a man keep his youth?
A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds.
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